Relationship Insights with LaDawn Black: Art, Advice, and Personal Growth

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Rob Lee
Welcome to the truth. That is art. I am your host. The Rob Lee and I get to put that in front.

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Rob Lee
Today I have the.

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Rob Lee
Privilege of being in conversation with relationship expert, voice, artist, multimedia personality and accomplished author of two Penguin Random House top selling relationship guides. Stripped bare the 12 truths that will help you land the very best black man. And let's get it on. 15 Hot Tips and Tricks to Spice Up Your Sex Life. Please welcome LaDawn Black.

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LaDawn Black.
Oh, I'm excited to be here. I really, really am.

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Rob Lee
Well, thank you for coming on and being here. We're here at the BMI. We're in a communications gallery.

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LaDawn Black.
It's gorgeous. It's a really interesting space. I feel like I'm part of TV and radio.

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Rob Lee
I thought it would be apt to bring you in here for this because I was like, I. You want to do the interview inside one of the car exhibits like, yeah. So here's the microphone. You get the front seat. I'll be in the back. Here's some questions.

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LaDawn Black.
That could have a sexy connotation to it as well.

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Rob Lee
This is true. This is true. I start thinking of that bit from Mallrats. It's like he's like, I'm going to have sex. A very uncomfortable location. And the bit is one thing is like in the back of a Volkswagen, it was like, no, he means something very different. There's not a Volkswagen.

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Rob Lee
So with that, before we get to two deep into the conversation.

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Rob Lee
I want to open it up with the thing that some people find uncomfortable. Some people are like, Yeah, I love talking about myself and us. The modern black story. Like ultimately your career in media, writing radio and ultimately.

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Rob Lee
Any life.

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Rob Lee
Experience that crafted your creative will help inform your creative sensibilities.

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LaDawn Black.
Well, you know what? It was a thing where I've always wanted to be a writer. And so one day I was like, Well, you know, I'm going to write this big American novel is going to be you know, is going to be Toni Morrison. It's going to be, you know, life changing for folks. I tried it. That didn't work.

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LaDawn Black.
Yeah. So I actually had someone say to me, you always give good love advice. Your friends come to you. They want relationship advice, write a relationship book and see what happens. So that's what I did. I wrote a relationship book to say, Look, this is my personal 15 tips to help you get a guy. I'm not a doctor.

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LaDawn Black.
I didn't go to school for this. This is just your best girlfriend advice. And people loved it. And so the book turned into a radio show here in Baltimore that had a tremendous run. And then it turned into TV and then it turned into a bigger book deal. So things just started to roll from there. So, you know, the TV, radio, all that stuff just sort of came from that one little book that told women how to get a man.

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Rob Lee
That's great. That's great. It's great. Start off. So in going into early media and kind of taking that kind of like that arc, if you will, right. Like, what was it to say? You know what, I really do want to do this because some people will say books are my lane and vice is my lane. That's it. So in making that kind of like leap, what was the thinking in that?

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LaDawn Black.
Well, I'll share a story with you that probably not told anyone outside of my family. So my first job was working in the drive thru at Popeye's in Suitland, Maryland, and I was about 14 years old. But the reason they put me in drive thru is because I have always had this voice.

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Rob Lee
Sure.

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LaDawn Black.
So as a 14 year old, it would be the giggles of the restaurant, the grown folks that I.

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Rob Lee
Worked with.

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LaDawn Black.
To have me talk through the box. May I help you? Oh, what would you like? What do you want to drink? Is that what you want to drink? You sure you want that? And you want it hot or cold? And then they would roll around and it would be the skinny 14 year old, and they'd be like, Oh.

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LaDawn Black.
So with that being said, I've always known that my voice has an effect on people. I would do the announcements in church and people would be a lot more interested in the announcement. Oh.

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Rob Lee
Oh.

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Rob Lee
Well, what else we got? How much water? Cool.

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LaDawn Black.
So the voice is always had an impact. But strangely enough, I never thought of it as a career that I could actually be in broadcasting, that the voice could pay. And so in writing the book, I was like, Well, you know, have you thought about radio? And actually, what happened here in Baltimore in 92? Q Was I went in for a radio interview.

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LaDawn Black.
The station manager heard my voice and he was like, You need to come back. And so eventually I got the gig. But, you know, I just never really thought about it. It's probably a story that you've heard from a lot of people, like it just was sort of an accident. A wonderful accident, but definitely an accident.

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Rob Lee
Yeah, I hear the thing of Rob. Your voice is something of a blur.

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Rob Lee
I was like, is it?

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LaDawn Black.
I don't know. I do have a great voice.

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Rob Lee
What do you do? I range in the course of a weekend, though. If it's a weekend and I've had a little bit of a drink for these days, I'm very refined, a sniff the river smooth. I sound like a different person. I was doing this transatlantic bit for a while. It was like, Oh, you sound like that.

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LaDawn Black.
And so you actually go into different what you like. You have accents.

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Rob Lee
I do.

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Rob Lee
I do. I mean, I got a piece of advice at a convention, actually, from this voice actor Beau Billingsley. And he's like a little guy. Have you always plays like these rough and tumble dudes? Right. But he always the characters that he voice, they're always like big guys, but he's a little dude. And he was talking about being able to have a range, right?

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Rob Lee
And I was like, All right, maybe this is my prep that I'm not even thinking of doing that I'm actually doing because when people are always surprised when they see me, it was like, Oh.

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Rob Lee
What.

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Rob Lee
Is my face? Do that. It does multiple.

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LaDawn Black.
Days. I mean, it could be. Wow, I'm impressed. Why are you taking it negative? You should not take it negative.

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Rob Lee
This is true. Yeah.

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Rob Lee
I think. I think it a surprise. Like I said, who is bad here?

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Rob Lee
So.

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Rob Lee
So let's talk about and I think this is very apt for kind of where we're at. I think enough people have like listened to this podcast and listened to you on the radio and through your books and all the work that you've done. Let's talk about, like, embracing your personality and being, like, truly ourselves. Like, I found it, you know, people connect to a personality and it's like you can have a great podcast, but no personality attached.

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Rob Lee
You, you have a great like, like presentation in other facets, whether it's in like movies or anything along those lines. If they don't like you personally, you know, or feel like they know you personally, they're not connecting with you. You can do like the greatest roles. Like, you know, like I'm. No.

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Rob Lee
So how do you like, go about presenting Hulu?

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Rob Lee
Don Blake is on the radio audible and print with like who you really are like or maybe outside of that capacity.

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LaDawn Black.
You know. To me, it's always been to be real on air. So in anything that I do books, radio, TV, whatever, I try to be authentic. So no, I don't have all the answers. Some of the stuff people say, yes, it makes me laugh to some stuff doesn't make sense. And I'll go, That don't make no sense, but okay, if you like it, I love it.

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LaDawn Black.
You know, that type of thing. You have to be genuine in your responses, but then you also have to be general. I say genuine as you say, in how you relate to your audience as well. So that interaction. So if you call and you talk to me on air, you know that I make you feel like, yeah, we, we're just having a conversation.

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LaDawn Black.
But more importantly, especially having been on the air here in Baltimore, it was if you run into me at my kid's school, if you run into me at the grocery store, you're going to get the thing. But on that, you hear on air, you know, I'm not telling you your favorite sexual position, but you know, you're going to get a genuine personality.

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LaDawn Black.
And I think people connect with authenticity. And I think that's really where sort of all of that sort of celebrity culture is going now. You know, are you really who do you want us to believe you are?

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Rob Lee
Yeah, I feel like there are like media Gallup polls that kind of float out there of like you're down a few points, you better disappear.

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Rob Lee
Just real quick. Yeah. And I think here.

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Rob Lee
It's definitely big. Like if you come off as fake for something like telling you what you're voting.

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LaDawn Black.
Absolutely no. I mean, when I first joined the station here in the city, I'm originally from D.C. I don't hide the fact. I know. Look at my look.

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Rob Lee
Here's my.

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LaDawn Black.
Water. Yes, he picks up his water. But I've never hidden the fact that I'm from D.C. and I've never sat around and say, oh, you know, I know all about these cities, this.

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Rob Lee
City right here, by.

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LaDawn Black.
The way. Oh, my son with the city. So yay.

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Rob Lee
City.

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LaDawn Black.
But, you know, I don't speak about Baltimore in a way that people speak about it who were born and raised here. However, I love the city. You can talk about the city all day and how much I love it. Is that with that all that.

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Rob Lee
We could talk about that.

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LaDawn Black.
But I think you have to be authentic. You have to be who you are and you have to genuinely connect with people.

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Rob Lee
Yeah, I think that's.

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Rob Lee
What gets this over these sorts of conversations over where, you know, I read like books on art, I've read books on like just how to connect with people, how to elicit a response from someone. And I could just say, yes, so tell me about this, this and this. And that's not really eliciting anything. But if I'm like trying to connect with you, that comes through in the end product.

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Rob Lee
It comes through in what the maybe what the listeners are getting like. I feel like I'm just listening to your conversations. Mm hmm. That's the goal. That's the intent.

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LaDawn Black.
And very important.

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Rob Lee
Authenticity is a major part of it. Being being real is a major part of that. And if it just comes by, like I'm just using these highly, just like these in those $5 words, it's like that's how you talk in real life.

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LaDawn Black.
And they don't really want to hear it. And then it's also creating a safe space. So creating a safe space, you know, if you're interviewing a celebrity, you know, a lot of times they come in the room and they're like, oh, of course, people ask me questions about who I'm dating, who I'm married to, what I'm doing, and they don't want to answer it.

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LaDawn Black.
But if you create a space where, look, we're just going to play this little game and you can say, Look it, just wink at me and I'll, I'll giggle and let people know whether or not you've actually, you know, you can make it a safe space. And then when you're just dealing with your listeners and viewers making sure that you know, the fact that you want to dress up in your My Little Pony pajamas, and that's the thing that turns you on, you know, or you like to dress up in your bear suit and rub yourself up against other people.

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LaDawn Black.
Yeah. All good. We can do all of that. There's no judgment. Yes.

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Rob Lee
It's blue cake, you know. Right? Not saying anything, you know, just the bare necessities, as it were.

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Rob Lee
Right.

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Rob Lee
And it's so stupid, so this is this is interesting, rooted in having, like, a background in providing, like, relationship advice, any advice, really. But relationship advice, it can be very tricky. Tell us how you like separate. You know, and I think it kind of ties to that previous question. But tell us how you separate maybe personal opinion on a certain like channel and someone maybe have an inquiry someone may have from like what you may believe is as an individual.

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Rob Lee
And while.

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Rob Lee
Providing like sound advice because it's like, I may not do this, but I think this might be what you should do. Right.

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LaDawn Black.
You know, it's you're always presented with things that you feel that is outside the realm of anything I've ever thought of. But would consider. But you have to understand, one, one of the standards that I set for the radio show is that if we're adults talking to adults, it's all good. Yeah, right. So we're talking about adult interactions.

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LaDawn Black.
Whatever turns you on, I'm willing to have that conversation with you. And then if someone put a thought out there that I didn't agree with, you know, when I started radio, you know, it was really still we were still in that anti gay space like, oh, we, we might talk.

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Rob Lee
About that now.

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LaDawn Black.
We're not going to talk about it. We don't do it. We never even go there. So I would get callers, you know, when we would have these frank conversations and people would call in for love advice. And it was clearly man, man, woman, woman, whatever. They would be like, well, why is that on air? You know, kids are listening.

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LaDawn Black.
I'm like at 11:00 at night, really? Like, sit your kids really be listening, you know, what do you tell me about your parenting skills? But, you know, I would let that call play where they would disagree with my opinions or the fact that I would let people talk about these things. But also I would, you know, you know, go back in, you know, at the end of the call and say, look, that's not what I personally believe.

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LaDawn Black.
This is what I think and this is how we operate on this show. But you get a platform as well. Yeah. So you have to know what your limits are, but also provide a space for people to be into. Do it, say the things that they need to say, because I think that's the fun of any type of entertainment, is hearing sometimes a different thought, a controversial thought, something that you didn't think you would even want to listen to?

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Rob Lee
Yeah, I think it opens it up for discourse to where when someone like we do this thing now, where we do is not an anti cancelation sort of thing, but it is more of a.

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LaDawn Black.
Now.

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Rob Lee
Let's just stop it versus No, no, I want to hear the whole thing so I can understand it to actually make it more normalized versus just, you know, we don't talk about that here. It's like no, like like you were touching on here's a platform. I may not agree with it, but I think you have the the right, if you will, to have your position, be able to speak your truth if you want the title.

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Rob Lee
It's one.

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Rob Lee
Thing.

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Rob Lee
To be able to share that and maybe have some understanding. And there have been folks that I've talked to on here that, you know, may have looked at what they do is not an art or not creative or not valid. And they would come back and say, wow, we're having this conversation. You treated me like an artist. You treated me like my work.

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Rob Lee
So my work matters. And I was like, Well, yeah, because it does, right? And it leads to a different understanding versus, oh, I'm not important. And it's really funny. Like I think that that's what I'm more into being there to have that broader conversation, to have some type of understanding.

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Rob Lee
Because I think, you know.

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Rob Lee
When people are talking about you right behind your back, you want to understand the power plants of the day. It's like, oh, oh, okay. So you call him a sloppy party bottom. Okay, cool. Of course. Whoa. I know what that means. I don't want to Google everything, right?

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Rob Lee
So. So how did you how did you manage or do.

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Rob Lee
You feel that being a voice of influence is a certain level of, like, responsibility? Like, how do you manage it?

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LaDawn Black.
It absolutely is a level of responsibility. I realized that my listeners didn't all look like me. They all weren't raised the same way. Their experiences of romance, love and sex were totally different. So I felt very early on that it was important that all the voices were heard. I also realized that there were young kids listening and sort of figuring out what their sexuality was or what love really looks like and what does that all of that mean.

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LaDawn Black.
So that was important, and there's a degree of responsibility in that as well. So yeah, you know, messaging around being protected when you have sex messaging around, you know, if things are going on that are inappropriate or that you don't want, who do you need to talk to? You know, so those conversations were had as well because I think as much as you want to entertain, as much as you want to tantalize and have fun, there is a degree of responsibility that's part of it.

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LaDawn Black.
And I think that I was able to strike the balance where you still felt like you were listening to a naughty show, but yet you weren't listening to crazy information.

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Rob Lee
Yeah, that information is is important. I think how we get it out there, it's what is it is like the grape juice with little cerebral cortex.

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Rob Lee
And I finally there's.

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Rob Lee
Something that's lacking in it. Like nowadays where it's like it doesn't take much for you to just have a podcast or have a voice out there. So it's like, you know, as I said earlier, I think it's important that people have their positions, but also is a certain responsibility. I think if people are aware of it and it seems like they're only certain people able to talk about sex and relationships is done in a way that is laying around where are we at?

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Rob Lee
Like, I feel like there's a shift. There is why this is a bit much.

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LaDawn Black.
It is.

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Rob Lee
And it's it's not overboard, but.

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Rob Lee
It's like you guys a lean a little bit too far into the entertainment piece and it goes for like, I guess content that's in this sort of binary normative thing that, oh, well, this is a women's podcast and we get raunchy. It's like, these are the guys and like we get dumb, right?

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Rob Lee
Thank you for pointing that out.

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Rob Lee
I mean, this, this is what I look at. I was like I was like, oh, I heard. All right. Where's the filth? There, though. This just seems like hot takes. So what have you seen? Like, what would you, like, want to see? Like, like different in that regard?

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LaDawn Black.
I would like to what I agree with your assessment because I think that because things go viral and because things because they go viral, hey, people pick those two lanes. Because if I'm raunchy, I get paid. And if I'm really, really silly, dumb or anti-woman, I get paid as well. So I think it's we understand why it happens.

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LaDawn Black.
But as far as are you helping anybody or you informing anybody, are you really entertaining or are you just going to be a 32nd clip on social media? You know, those are the things that are in question. And so I think what we need to realize is that there is a responsibility to go back to your responsibility. QUESTION There is a responsibility because if I click on 30 seconds of, oh, this was just really funny and interesting, and then I go back and there's nothing else there that's going to protect me, inform me, or let me know that you're actually someone that I should be listening to.

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LaDawn Black.
Then what's the value in that? So I think I have no problem with quote unquote, regular people saying, look, you know, I've had this experience. I want to share it and help others. No problem with that. I'm a regular person who decided to do that. I just think that we have to get back to responsibility and we also have to see sometimes where our blind spots are.

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LaDawn Black.
So I'm a guy and I've been hurt by women and I'm just going to go out here and say, big brothers. I just go about here and just say that women are messing things up and women don't know their value and they're overvaluing themselves and guys, you know, are being emasculated and blah, blah, blah, whatever that is. So I have to also understand and be willing to say, well, I feel this way because my mom was mistreated or I feel this way because I've been mistreated in relationships or I've had bad relationships, there doesn't seem to be a balance and there used to be a balance where you would get the guys going in on

00;18;31;03 - 00;18;48;03
LaDawn Black.
the girls, but they would also say, you know, but I haven't always been the greatest guy you would get the women who would be raunchy and talk about sex and crazy and insane ways. But they would also say, well, you know, romance is still pretty important as well. We need to strike a balance.

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Rob Lee
Yeah.

00;18;49;10 - 00;19;15;06
Rob Lee
I've made two attempts and in doing a sex ed oriented podcast around people of color and doing all of that, and I always looked at it from the standpoint of not replicating the nothing's new, right? But an attempt to replicate a what you would get for like a love line or something like that. Like I want something that's educational and I want to be, you know, the mid, the, the avatar for you, a common person.

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Rob Lee
It's like you have this person that knows maybe the Kinsey stuff or what have you that study this and this is.

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Rob Lee
So tell me about butts.

00;19;22;18 - 00;19;48;12
Rob Lee
You know, or whatever. And you know, and I remember at times, especially in the second iteration of this, you know, people would reach back out to my co-host and he would say, like, yeah, you know, I was dropped some knowledge about being a witness certain things that he's experienced being a bigger guy and being in this sort of lane and you know, but then also it's like a weird confidence that it's like conflicting and it's like, yeah, can we examine that more?

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Rob Lee
And getting that sort of feedback because people felt value in that versus just having to take, as you were talking about your 30 seconds, sort of here's this bit and let's move on to the next thing, right? It's disposable in some regards. So I'm going to talk about writing in a little bit. So the person wearing many hats, you know, not wearing a hat currently, but is a person where they need big hair but not having it.

00;20;09;04 - 00;20;31;28
Rob Lee
So as a person wear many hats, as many creatives do, you have to be a little bit more judicious on how you spend your time. I know that I do. When you're taking on a project, perhaps writing what is like the first thing you do, something that's in the middle and something towards the end. In terms of the process, is it like, look, I have a nice warm cup of coffee or tea and figure out which direction I want to go here?

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Rob Lee
How many pages is this going to be in on page 69? There will always be a hard whatever. Like what is the the thing for you?

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LaDawn Black.
Oh, my gosh. You know what? Being a writer and then having interviewed lots and lots of writers, you know, in our minds we like to say, oh, they're in a cabin and the cabins on the water and they're drinking, you know, fine wine or having that great coffee and they're writing all day. And and then, you know, it's just a process and no, most writers, like most creatives, you either fill in it or you're not.

00;21;04;15 - 00;21;22;19
LaDawn Black.
So you get this groove or you're like, I have something I want to say. I have something I want to create. For me, the process is I have a book that's in my head, a message that I want to pursue. And so usually it starts with, okay, well let me just put it on paper. So it's usually just an outline sketch and then I'm a procrastinator.

00;21;22;20 - 00;22;00;08
LaDawn Black.
So I would love to have this out by February of 2023 because it's Valentine's Day. This would be great. So then you find I'm the person who's like January 15th, oh, maybe I might want to write it at this point. So, you know, not that you know that specifically that, but you know, I'm a last minute person. So last minute means that we're going to get it on the page, we're going to write and then we're going to edit and then we're going to send it to people to edit and then we're going to try to sell it in the you get up into that structure, but it really starts with a great idea and

00;22;00;08 - 00;22;11;27
LaDawn Black.
sort of whom our audience will be an audience that I feel like needs to be spoken to when it comes to the love, sex and relationships, that's where it starts. And then you describe and after that, yeah.

00;22;12;14 - 00;22;25;18
Rob Lee
Yeah. I love a grind, you know, I think my process starts off with a big cold Thomas sweater, especially on this time of the year. You know, I just do a little bit of this outside the that time guys.

00;22;25;18 - 00;22;27;02
Rob Lee
Yeah but but I definitely.

00;22;27;02 - 00;22;47;00
Rob Lee
Agree with it where I've been trying to insert more since everything is all digital and I feel like it leads to like I'm losing ideas here because I'm being too manicured in how I approach it. It's like, let me delete this. I'd rather keep a notepad on me and click on a monday morning. It's like I'm locked in.

00;22;47;06 - 00;23;20;19
Rob Lee
That is when I'm at my most productive and then it kind of dwindles down. And I know we have this idea of we make art within the time that's permitted, but I believe, like for me on a monday, that's what I want to get my questions done. That's what I do a lot of my research just just because I'm like fresh and avant garde and I don't have maybe the week's interviews in my head of Wow, that was a really cool conversation because I want to keep those things siloed as separate because an interview may come out at a different time and it's like, I can't reference this person in this conversation so big, intentionally

00;23;20;19 - 00;23;37;11
Rob Lee
vague. But I think in the beginning of the week, being able to go through all the interviews, go through all pesky press clippings and questions, and do the research on the guest to come up with questions that I think I'm interested in. And I think that the listeners might be interested in. But, you know, sometimes I have a little too far out.

00;23;37;28 - 00;23;48;02
Rob Lee
Like I know for September I had 45 interviews scheduled. I was like not writing all of these and we get a lot. I was like, I was going to do this week to week is going to be like, this is the date and here's the questions.

00;23;48;02 - 00;23;51;01
Rob Lee
Grace You may have just different concepts.

00;23;51;01 - 00;23;51;22
Rob Lee
They pop up and.

00;23;51;22 - 00;23;53;24
Rob Lee
It's like, no, that's a question I really want to ask.

00;23;53;24 - 00;24;00;23
Rob Lee
This dude. Or Yeah, I wonder how she does that. So I think in doing it like up front, it's like I like to edit as I've been.

00;24;00;23 - 00;24;01;19
Rob Lee
Doing right here.

00;24;01;24 - 00;24;13;17
Rob Lee
As I go along because new concepts pop up, new ideas. I was like, You might not know that a person's like are really like peanut butter, right? In this sort of way. And like, what? Jif, skippy.

00;24;14;23 - 00;24;21;12
LaDawn Black.
And it goes in a whole different direction. Yeah, but it's interesting but it's an interesting direction. Yeah. And that's the thing that you have to kind of look out for.

00;24;22;04 - 00;24;39;03
Rob Lee
So when you go back and look at recent work and I was telling you a little bit before we got started out of my old work. So you look at recent work compared to like older work. Describe that like feeling like and looking at, all right, this was my first book. This is my most recent book or wow, looking at some old clips or maybe YouTube of, you know, time on the radio and such.

00;24;39;04 - 00;24;42;17
Rob Lee
Right. Versus now tell me about the feeling.

00;24;42;17 - 00;25;02;21
LaDawn Black.
Definitely from the radio standpoint. You know, I look at some of my earlier interviews, listen to some of the older shows, and I could just tell I was fairly prepared. I had my questions. I have a topic I had, you know, everything was really, really prepared where, you know, almost 20 years in a game at this point, you know, I could sit down across from you.

00;25;02;28 - 00;25;31;17
LaDawn Black.
I mean, of course, I still need to know, you know, who you are, what you do, why you're here. But literally, like you just said, you know, we're going to talk about your project. We're going to talk about the reason you're here. But if we connect around kids or if we connect around, you know, what it's like to be dating now over 40 or whatever, whatever that connection is, that's really what you run with because, you know, especially if you're talking to someone who's known, they've done the project interview every where.

00;25;31;17 - 00;25;51;27
LaDawn Black.
Yes. So after a while, you know, do I need to hear the date and when it's coming in, who's featured? No, I want to get to know you. So you really have to plug into those unique features. So that's the big thing interview wise. I can tell I've grown, I've gotten a lot more comfortable, you know, when it comes to books, you know, I have a different story to tell now.

00;25;52;02 - 00;26;14;21
LaDawn Black.
You know, the story I was telling then was, Oh, how to find your ideal guy, how to sex your ideal guy. Because I was married and I was successful and this is great. Like, I found love, but, you know, situations changed. Yeah. And so now the focus is more so on. What is it like to go back out there and date when you didn't date when people were doing online dating?

00;26;14;21 - 00;26;39;00
LaDawn Black.
Like all of this is new. Like it's a whole different environment, but it's fun to have those conversations now to look at projects from that perspective, to look at it from how do you really introduce your kids to someone that you're dating? Like, do you even do that? Like, is that ever a good idea? You know, those types of questions that didn't really tackle 20 years ago.

00;26;39;12 - 00;26;54;14
LaDawn Black.
I can talk you know, tackle those questions now. So you kind of see sort of where your life is taking you, where your career is taking you. And the conversations change. But the pluses is that you've been in these spaces so long that the conversations are easier to have.

00;26;54;22 - 00;27;11;18
Rob Lee
Yeah, I agree with that. I look at interviews that I've done in the past. Sometimes I'll interview someone else like twice or what have you. It's been a few where I was like, I've interviewed you twice in six months, bro. Like, what's new and what are you guys? I tried to do the exact same thing. Now you're just exposing me.

00;27;11;18 - 00;27;12;09
Rob Lee
You're looking mid.

00;27;12;26 - 00;27;14;01
Rob Lee
But yeah, it is one.

00;27;14;01 - 00;27;30;29
Rob Lee
Of those things and I look back at, you know, my journey as a podcaster and just how I approach certain things like absolutely being overprepared and doing all of this. And I look at, I was like, I was 24 and I just got started. I'll be 38 in January and it's like, Hey, but different do now, much different do.

00;27;31;08 - 00;27;50;02
Rob Lee
I was like, I'm not talking about this anymore. Or even just, you know, having a habit through point of like, I'm still who I am, but it's like my position is a little bit more refined, a little bit more mature in a certain area, in other other areas. It's like I've expanded, you know. But in some areas it's like, this is going to be the same.

00;27;50;02 - 00;28;14;23
Rob Lee
This is just who I am. This is embedded in what my experience is being, you know, a black male from East Baltimore that's just there. That's what that experience is. But in having over 500 conversations with different creative types, I start speaking in the Parliament, I start speaking in the quote unquote jargon. And for us marketing people, you know, be a lot more of these are the four PS with five PS or.

00;28;17;11 - 00;28;19;04
Rob Lee
So your career.

00;28;19;04 - 00;28;29;03
Rob Lee
Includes like being in a relationship expert for oxygen bed TV one, CW one. We have a lot and a lot of tell me the name in Wow.

00;28;29;09 - 00;28;30;12
Rob Lee
Where does your work.

00;28;30;12 - 00;28;39;13
Rob Lee
On that spectrum? Where does your work fall like overall between being driven by passion or curiosity? Where does it fall at?

00;28;39;17 - 00;28;41;17
LaDawn Black.
Oh, that's a good question.

00;28;41;18 - 00;28;43;02
Rob Lee
Well, thank you. Um.

00;28;44;24 - 00;29;02;13
LaDawn Black.
Curiosity is a big piece for me. I am nosy. I like to know what you're doing. So, you know, everybody. My family says, look, you are the one person that people will tell them, tell you everything about themselves, and leave and know nothing about. You feel like they had a full conversation.

00;29;02;25 - 00;29;04;23
Rob Lee
I feel so great. I learned so much.

00;29;05;10 - 00;29;06;23
Rob Lee
I'm sure you did. I'm sorry that.

00;29;06;28 - 00;29;28;20
LaDawn Black.
But I will know all your business. So I am just one of those people. I'm curious to I'm going to let you talk and nothing that you say will surprise or shock me. So you're going to tell me even more? So, yes, a lot of it comes, especially in that love space, from curiosity and wanting to understand what people are doing, you know, really what turns you on, what motivates you.

00;29;29;09 - 00;29;46;08
LaDawn Black.
And then also a piece of it is to entertain her, you know. So I think that it's always fun to let people have a good time. People come into different spaces because they want to have fun. So you have to entertain to a certain extent as well.

00;29;46;26 - 00;30;00;08
Rob Lee
Yeah, I agree with that. A lot of wine and cheese and there isn't a lot of good stuff too. So this is a bullet point to this that previous question. This is overarching. This is this is put you on a spot, but this is also overarching.

00;30;01;16 - 00;30;02;19
Rob Lee
How can folks.

00;30;02;19 - 00;30;12;24
Rob Lee
With an ex, I guess, be more proactive in in making love, sex and relationships happen. Oh, and this is generalities, obviously.

00;30;12;24 - 00;30;15;24
LaDawn Black.
So you're just saying in general, how could you get more of all the good.

00;30;15;24 - 00;30;17;19
Rob Lee
Stuff, all the yummy if there were.

00;30;18;12 - 00;30;34;04
LaDawn Black.
One? You got to let people know that you're interested in the yummy. Okay. That's a big thing. You know, I over the years, I've been amazed in talking to people. They're like, well, you know, I want to date, I want to meet somebody interesting. Well, I just want to have a great experience and share it with someone. And you're in your house.

00;30;35;00 - 00;30;54;20
LaDawn Black.
You don't go anywhere. If friends and family don't know that you're looking for someone, you're not engaged online, nobody knows in you're in your house is not going to happen. Right. So that's a big thing. So you have to let folks know in as much as we want to be private people, there's no harm in letting people know I'm going to have to really like to meet somebody nice.

00;30;55;07 - 00;31;12;07
LaDawn Black.
Because the thing I say is they may hook you up with someone to say like, I don't want to be bothered with that person or that person has friends and that's the benefit. So you just expanding your circle. The second thing is you have to stop being so picky. Not that you take everything, but sometimes you'll be surprised by what you like.

00;31;12;08 - 00;31;29;03
LaDawn Black.
You know, you have a list of things that you like, things that you want to bring into your life as far as a person or a situation. But you can be surprised as well. So if I love tall guys and he happens to be five, four, you said it like that's evil.

00;31;29;15 - 00;31;30;11
Rob Lee
Sorry, Shorty.

00;31;32;07 - 00;31;53;28
LaDawn Black.
You know, I mean, you have to be open to things that may not necessarily be your type. Okay. And then probably the final bit of advice that I'll give is be honest with yourself. You know, sometimes I literally had this conversation with someone a couple of days ago, Oh, she's so nice and she's so wonderful, but she doesn't do anything for me.

00;31;53;28 - 00;32;15;20
LaDawn Black.
Like, it just it ain't happening like I try. I have to kind of coach my way into that thing, but she's nice and I'm going to feel guilty because I've spent you know, a couple of months, you know, nurturing this thing that is not happening. And I'm like, Dude, you got to tell her, because, number one, she already knows that you're not into her.

00;32;16;09 - 00;32;25;26
LaDawn Black.
That's just how it because at this point, you're wasting her time that we have to be honest about the things that we want and the things that we don't want and be bold enough to say that saying it.

00;32;26;08 - 00;32;26;14
Rob Lee
Yeah.

00;32;26;22 - 00;32;31;11
LaDawn Black.
Because a lot of us are wasting time and energy in situations we don't want to be bothered with.

00;32;31;22 - 00;32;52;20
Rob Lee
I remember one point in the whole online scene. I remember I threw out, they're so, so ridiculous. I was just trying to be the most the most Aquarius as possible and just saying like something really weird. It's like, yeah, I don't talk to women who speak English a girl's like, excuse. Like, this is like, what do you mean?

00;32;52;20 - 00;33;10;18
Rob Lee
And I was just trying to go so extreme that when I initially come back from being the Hulk to Bruce Banner in terms of personality, it's like, Oh, oh, you're just you're this guy. Oh, I heard your worst already. So you're falling apart. And it was just like I was like, I'm being completely facetious. She's like, Oh, you like to make a joke out of everything?

00;33;10;18 - 00;33;30;23
Rob Lee
I was like, Yes, yes. It's exactly what I do. So so this is the last real question I have before I get to those great rapid fire questions, too. Having a background in writing marketing media as it relates to Baltimore, why must culture be at the forefront, be at the heart of like the healthy development of this larger community?

00;33;31;08 - 00;33;58;18
LaDawn Black.
Because that's what makes Baltimore unique. I mean, you look at your major cities. To me, Baltimore has a strong culture. It's the base of African-American history. You can find that all throughout the street, throughout the city. Then the unique things about the Baltimore culture, you know, Baltimore club music, you know, the art this featured here, the famous people who built their careers here were born here, were educated here.

00;33;58;18 - 00;34;17;12
LaDawn Black.
The city is about culture. You can't talk Baltimore and not talk about the tattoos and the dogs and the drugs and all of that. That is Baltimore. And there's nothing wrong with it. You know, the guys match in their shirts to the shoes like that. That took me out. Like, I was like, how in the world did you find that perfect?

00;34;17;12 - 00;34;38;07
LaDawn Black.
Like a perfect match? Not like the race is a little off sometimes in other cities and Baltimore is never off. We find the match. So those are things that are very unique, things that are very Baltimore. And I think the people here love it. And it's something when people visit, they feel and they experience and they love it as well.

00;34;38;07 - 00;34;59;10
LaDawn Black.
So you could talk about, you know, oh, it's great housing options, you know, affordable city, city that's open 24 hours. Lots to do. Great areas where you can feel safe, great areas that you can go to and experience history. All those things are wonderful. But Baltimore is about culture, is about the people. It's being in the neighborhoods, meeting people, experiencing it.

00;34;59;21 - 00;35;02;09
LaDawn Black.
That's the beauty of the city, without question.

00;35;02;21 - 00;35;09;03
Rob Lee
Thank you. That's that's that's great. That's, you know, shout out to, you know, the people that don't know any better. They're familiar.

00;35;09;17 - 00;35;11;12
LaDawn Black.
But better was like a little commercial, right?

00;35;11;13 - 00;35;13;06
Rob Lee
Yeah.

00;35;13;06 - 00;35;16;15
Rob Lee
Every now and again, if there's an ad or so here, you come visit Baltimore.

00;35;16;15 - 00;35;17;26
Rob Lee
And you're like, You'll enjoy it.

00;35;18;24 - 00;35;23;04
LaDawn Black.
I like it. You'll actually like it. Ah, I actually like it. I think there's a bumper sticker.

00;35;23;12 - 00;35;32;21
Rob Lee
That a bumper sticker gives me. I get the side it on occasion I was like, All right, where are you from again? So all right. So I guess some rapid fire questions.

00;35;32;21 - 00;35;33;00
LaDawn Black.
All right.

00;35;33;21 - 00;35;40;14
Rob Lee
Brevity is key here. Brevity is key. On a Friday night, you're typically doing, what.

00;35;41;06 - 00;35;48;11
LaDawn Black.
Friday night? I am typically cooking out on the waterfront and I'll just leave it there.

00;35;49;04 - 00;35;49;17
Rob Lee
Hmm.

00;35;50;06 - 00;35;52;27
Rob Lee
What is your favorite color? And I spelled that color with a you, by the way.

00;35;53;05 - 00;36;01;11
LaDawn Black.
Ooh, you gave me the special spelling black eye. I know. So bright is always appropriate.

00;36;01;18 - 00;36;01;26
Rob Lee
Yeah.

00;36;02;10 - 00;36;10;29
LaDawn Black.
Black can be messy and it doesn't show like you can still drink for yourself or sit in the wrong spot. And you're right. I like black. It's great. Black is.

00;36;10;29 - 00;36;14;27
Rob Lee
Great. You can't. You have been, you know, it's just like so I.

00;36;14;28 - 00;36;16;22
LaDawn Black.
Can't be lancie. Those are the two things you can't.

00;36;17;06 - 00;36;22;04
Rob Lee
Don't don't be Lindsay. No pets, no big A's. I'm a great guy. And I agree.

00;36;22;25 - 00;36;27;22
LaDawn Black.
I agree, too. And I love grand houses. And, you know, people are sick of it. They're like, will they stop the walls? Great.

00;36;28;02 - 00;36;29;23
Rob Lee
Oh, great. It's just like, get a good gray.

00;36;29;24 - 00;36;45;13
Rob Lee
No, no. Gentrification gray. You know, gray and oxblood for me, I like to wear the color of my enemies and I like to speak about neutrality. And somewhere in the middle place, if you were offered the opportunity to be a superhero, what would your superpower be?

00;36;46;04 - 00;36;49;26
LaDawn Black.
Oh, see through clothes. And I've just got to leave it there.

00;36;50;17 - 00;36;51;16
Rob Lee
I'm here for it to be.

00;36;51;16 - 00;36;53;04
LaDawn Black.
Funny and sexy at the same time.

00;36;53;16 - 00;37;03;01
Rob Lee
I mean, I want to see too far as I go, bro. I just want to see underwear layers like, you know, those and clean, right? What what size do you need to go out?

00;37;03;01 - 00;37;04;16
Rob Lee
You need to go up, right?

00;37;05;12 - 00;37;06;07
Rob Lee
There's a large.

00;37;08;15 - 00;37;09;15
Rob Lee
What is your.

00;37;10;21 - 00;37;15;19
Rob Lee
Go to snack? I mean, I enjoy snacking. I don't I don't know if you're a snacker, but I enjoy snacking.

00;37;15;23 - 00;37;19;19
LaDawn Black.
Yeah, I like almond bars.

00;37;19;23 - 00;37;20;05
Rob Lee
You get it?

00;37;20;11 - 00;37;26;04
LaDawn Black.
Yeah. They have to be in the fridge first. So, like, even if you buy them out, like running home to put them in the fridge, they have to be cold.

00;37;26;08 - 00;37;27;11
Rob Lee
Yeah. Mm hmm.

00;37;27;11 - 00;37;34;10
Rob Lee
Yeah. Mm hmm. I'm a I'm a big cashew guy these days. Um, I'll get, like, a handful of nuts, you know? It's good with the magnesium, all of that stuff. Yes.

00;37;34;10 - 00;37;34;26
LaDawn Black.
Healthy.

00;37;34;26 - 00;37;38;26
Rob Lee
Yeah. And it's like our in some of that the cod season and put on top of that.

00;37;39;09 - 00;37;39;18
Rob Lee
The.

00;37;40;12 - 00;37;45;01
Rob Lee
Little lime and chili man. It's just me being boozy and I have it with vermouth.

00;37;45;03 - 00;37;46;06
LaDawn Black.
Oh, my goodness.

00;37;46;09 - 00;37;47;29
Rob Lee
I'm a boozy dude. I know.

00;37;47;29 - 00;37;49;12
LaDawn Black.
I'm like, I'm learning things.

00;37;50;02 - 00;37;51;17
Rob Lee
Probably that maybe I'm going to.

00;37;52;07 - 00;37;52;11
Rob Lee
Get.

00;37;53;02 - 00;38;10;14
Rob Lee
The big Bhuj. Now, this is the last one I got for you. So doing your time hosting the love zone and they to kill. Well, what comes to mind is a really strange call. Oh, you know, I look this up, but I want to have it on this platform so you don't look this up.

00;38;10;27 - 00;38;35;26
LaDawn Black.
All right? I had a man who would call me every night and say that he had on his leopard print pantsuits. And he just wanted to say to me every night and I have no doubt that he was calling me in his leopard print panties. And so he would call out, like, what do you have on? Oh, I have my leopard print panties.

00;38;35;26 - 00;38;55;07
LaDawn Black.
I was like, Really your leopard print panties? And it was so funny because people, you know, of course we're doing the show via Facebook. You know, we are on social media with the question, is this now when people would comment his leopard print panty guy. So yeah he was one of my favorites I don't know where he is in his leopard print panties.

00;38;55;07 - 00;39;06;13
LaDawn Black.
He sounded like he might have been a little older at that point, so he may be rest in peace in his leopard print panties, but he just like calling me to tell me that. And it was the highlight of his night.

00;39;06;13 - 00;39;28;15
Rob Lee
I think that is amazing. I think I think I want like crocodile skin panties and might be a skin condition. I don't know. But I'll be great. Just, you know, just here. I'll say again. They'll be it'll be great. Yes. So that's it for me. Actually, the questions. But I want to thank you for coming on to this podcast.

00;39;28;15 - 00;39;36;15
Rob Lee
And secondarily, that's on a word. But secondly, I want to invite and encourage you to telephone folks. Where's the check you out and where your books are and all of that good stuff. The floor.

00;39;36;21 - 00;39;38;25
LaDawn Black.
Is yours. Oh, wow. I get to do a commercial.

00;39;39;07 - 00;39;39;18
Rob Lee
Totally.

00;39;39;20 - 00;39;41;03
Rob Lee
Okay. I use to call it shameless plugs.

00;39;41;03 - 00;40;05;26
LaDawn Black.
Shameless plugs. Okay. Okay, I'll do one of those Louden Black. You can catch me at Instagram or Twitter. It's T solid on Facebook. If you're still old school and you're logging on, have in conversations, you can go on to Facebook as my mom is the Facebook and search down Logan Black also you can hear me on air because that's usually the question like, are you even on the radio anymore?

00;40;06;05 - 00;40;24;09
LaDawn Black.
And I am. I'm on WBLS in New York on the weekends, so make sure you check me out there. WPLG dot com one of 7.5 FM. If you're in the New York area and I'm always in the Baltimore Street, still something, so you can always catch up with me in the street. Say hi, guys. That's up here. We didn't talk about that.

00;40;25;06 - 00;40;25;20
Rob Lee
You could do it.

00;40;25;20 - 00;40;43;29
LaDawn Black.
Now you know what? When people see you out, it's the thing that drives me nuts. Okay? If there's a fan experience, you know, if I have fans, a fan experience that drives me nuts is to be out and then get a dime. They say, Oh, I saw you a safe way. I didn't want to say hi. I'm like, I'm in.

00;40;43;29 - 00;40;45;21
LaDawn Black.
Save what say you get the.

00;40;45;21 - 00;40;46;28
Rob Lee
Neck bones, anybody.

00;40;47;08 - 00;40;47;13
Rob Lee
I.

00;40;48;16 - 00;41;02;16
LaDawn Black.
Say hi, I need people to say hi. So if you see me out in the streets and I know I'm looking crazy, get the mom. But I got the leggings on. I know I look, Matt probably looks like I don't want to be bothered but trust just say hi, I'm cool, say hi.

00;41;02;16 - 00;41;21;08
Rob Lee
That does not work for me though. Avoid me at all costs. Just like that's. Just don't get too familiar, bro. He's Baltimore. I'm out here. I am going to be wearing leggings, probably. Yeah, yeah, definitely wear leggings. And and Doc Martin's and. Yeah, it depends. It depends if I have the shaved head, I have a little hair right now.

00;41;21;14 - 00;41;32;21
Rob Lee
If I have the shaved head and I just got the beard and the leggings like a hoodie, it's like they'll, they'll say, don't, don't run up on me for a microphone. Please. Please do. I'm look for interviews. Hi, guys. Hey, funders.

00;41;33;11 - 00;41;41;11
LaDawn Black.
You don't get to pick though that don't get the pick. And I think an experience that I've had that I've been like, oh, okay.

00;41;41;22 - 00;41;42;03
Rob Lee
Spend it.

00;41;42;15 - 00;41;43;04
LaDawn Black.
You ready for this.

00;41;43;07 - 00;41;43;13
Rob Lee
Is.

00;41;44;04 - 00;42;06;18
LaDawn Black.
The only time is inappropriate is when you're in the doctor's office and like something is leaking or bleeding or something like that. And they're like listening to you. Are you the lady on the radio? I'm like, in this moment. No, I'm not in this moment. I'm trying to decide if I have pneumonia or not. If you're part of my medical situation, please act like you don't know me.

00;42;06;20 - 00;42;09;29
LaDawn Black.
It just will make me feel a lot better. If you don't know me.

00;42;10;07 - 00;42;16;12
Rob Lee
It's like, Damn, Rob hated your last episode. Your blood pressure's a little higher right now, so you can't. You can't do those, like, back to back.

00;42;16;13 - 00;42;18;07
LaDawn Black.
It makes me sad.

00;42;18;08 - 00;42;39;23
Rob Lee
Those are different things. Like, yeah, I'm. I'm still getting used to it, you know, like I said, I'm a noticeable individual, but people say, Yo, love the podcast. I'm like, from streets away and say, Who said that? It's like, I'm in a horror movie, right where I. So there you have it, folks. I want to again thank LaDawn Black.coming onto the park and the great LaDawn Black. oh to podcast.

00;42;40;05 - 00;42;55;18
Rob Lee
And I'm probably saying that there is an art culture sexy things in and around Baltimore you've just got to look for absolutely.